My Progress - Lent (Part 4)

I made a pact to God and myself to give up rice and eating after 6pm; because I knew that these two things were the hardest to give up. I can say however, that to date Sundays were my hardest day. You see, it is the norm for me to eat throughout the day sometimes until I go to bed. My new trend is drinking tea throughout the day, lol.

Lent ends in five days and I have been reflecting on how funny it is for us to say that we cannot do something or cannot live without something; when the truth is, it is our fear of the unknown that prevents us from trying or letting go.

I have learned a lot these past 5-weeks one of which is that I  am more resilient but more importantly that I have great self-control, a quality that is often hard to sustain. I have learned that having self-control becomes easy if the end goal is one that you, yourself have agreed to. One must be willing to live through the constraints and resist the temptation that comes with the decision made.

that strength comes with the determination to succeed and the will power to make it no matter what.  This journey has left me with great life lessons and I will share some with you:

1) when making a life change decision we must be able to pay the price to achieve it

2) no matter how hard  try manage your well-power the temptation to cheat or partake

3) keep track of  the incremental accomplishments, it makes a difference your progress will propel you forward

4) give yourself time to reflect periodically as some days will be harder than other

5) have confidence in yourself, alway be positive and self-motivated

6) don't believe that stressing is necessary, remember you are human and discomfort will come be that too will pass

No matter the journey life changes are important to propel us to the next stage in our life cycle. We must  commit to the changes we have made and work through the constraints as hard as they are.

My Progress - Lent (Part 3)

Okay, remember this is new to me; providing ball-by-ball commentary on what I eat.  But I am trying I am sure by day 10 I will get it, lol.  Here goes...

Day 2 (February 11, 2016)
This the day after work and my first day of work after Ash Wednesday.  I commenced the day praying, as I usually do, and then I started to thinking about breakfast.  I was so feeling for porridge and fried dumpling and so I proceed to Juci Patties. Juci Patties sells the best dumpling and porridge you can ever taste.  Breakfast was divine.

My days are usually long and where I work the tuck-shop does not have a lot of variety, it only sells snacks.  So at about 3 pm when my stomach started to rumble I ran to the tuck-shop and the only thing of interest was Nissin chicken cup soup. So bought it and that was for lunch.  Remember this is not a dieting activity, I am just doing Lent. The remainder of the day was I just did coffee. I left work at 7:00 pm which is a record breaker, lol.

Day 3  (February 12, 2016)
Okay, so I stayed home do to care trouble and I can tell you that as soon as I wake I hungry.  When I am at home,  however, I usually start off by drinking coffee and I proceed to that.  Remember that I had a dumpling in my bag from the day before and went for it.  It was cold but really good.  My step-daughter and I decided to cook stew chicken and food.  In Jamaica, we call yam, banana, coco, sweet potato, excreta food.  I cooked up a storm and finished at 3 pm. We ate and I took a nap and work up at 5:30 pm and had seconds. No, I don't know if my body is operating on the premise that I can't eat after 6 pm but that is what happened.  The rest of the night was spent watching "Everybody Hates Chris" sipping coffee.

Day 4  (February 13, 2016)

Today is day 4 and I am home, mom did breakfast I did not partake.  I did my coffee and had  Otaheite Apple  and coffee. The best breakfast every.  I went to sleep, yes on Saturday and Sunday I usually rest and so I woke up at about 4:30 pm, hungry as hell and headed out for KFC, tasty.  A little secret that I must let out, I have been exercising every day for the last 4 day and I will keep you posted on that part of this journey.  You see my father says that I am not committed to being healthy, I use to weigh 124 pounds and since 2002 my I have been consistently gaining weight. I now weigh 241 pounds.  I am not doing this to loose weight but I say my father smile when he saw me exercising for 4 consecutive days.  I am happy for that.

Well, tomorrow is Sunday, let's see how that day goes.

My Progress - Lent (Part 2)

I  started the day by just cleansing my thoughts.  Yes, my thoughts. I reached out to every person in my life who had me pondering.  I sent them a text and expressed my truth.  It was a very emotional but a very relieving process. I felt light less conflicted. 

It was a great start point on my journey through Lent. 

Having completed this task, I prepared breakfast, saltfish fritters and Nescafe. Yes, I so love coffee. The meal was so divine; I enjoyed every piece of it.  But I forgot one of my processes for Lent taking pictures to share with you.  Please forgive, this new to me sharing my day and thoughts. I will endeavour never to forget.

I added another criterion to my Lent list; no eating after 6 pm.  Let me tell you, this is even harder than cutting rice from my diet. I am a late eat, after hours is when my creative juice kicks in and so does my appetite. 

Well, even as I type I can hear my stomach rolling as it is accustomed to receiving food at this hour, lol. But I am not going to concede; I am a strong girl and I can do this. 

Day 1 done, here goes day two.

Lent - Part 1

I was christened a Catholic and as such, I have an appreciation for Lent. The ability to abstain represents our own sacrificial offering to God; as it was during these 40 days that Jesus Christ  travel the journey to the cross were is to shade he gave his life to so that we could live and be forgiven.

This is my first time, actually participating in Lent and I want to share my journey with you.

During the period of Lent, I will be giving up rice.  Why rice? Well, it is my favourite starch. I eat rice any time of the day with or without protein. I even make rice porridge, tasty.

Oh yes, I will be giving up red meat, that is Lent 101, LOL.

Trust, I don’t know, I do not know how,  I am going to do this!! But I must

I must let you know that in Jamaica for lunch;  most restaurants prepare only rice  as a starch to serve (white rice, rice and peas, callaloo rice, etc); which means that I will have to prepare lunch and take it to work.  This will be a mammoth task,  as I work 12- 15hours most days, plus I am going to school, SMH.

Well I am committed.  I will do it this and I will keep you posted.  I will also take pictures of my meals and share it with you. 

Tomorrow is Lent people, so here goes!!!!

Time... Makes or Breaks a Relationship

We have all heard that sex is the most important ingredient in a relationship. And while I believe it has its role; time in my opinion is the most important element as its glues all the other ingredients in a relationship.

Time is what is needed to get know and understand each other. It is time, that builds friendship, which is needed to connect socially, emotionally, physically, psychologically and even sexually. Creating time for your partner demonstrates the commit you have to the relationship and its sustainability.

If we look at it,  time is really the main feature in all forms of relationship even as a parent you have to create the time to get know; in order to fulfil the needs of your children.

It is not that complicated.  The complication comes when you make excuses for not being able to spend time.  We often use work, school, friends  or our children as a crutch; when all it boils down to is time management and prioritizing.  Building a relationship takes conscious effort to factor your spouse in your calendar. Yes, I said  the calendar that little tool that structures your professional life add your personal and family appoints. The friends hang out taking priority over family and spouse time; also need to be monitored.  I agree that we need time away from our spouse, to chill and unwind; but  must not be that hanging out with friends whether it be on the phone or in person okay and the spouse takes the back seat. Building any relationship takes time hence you need to balance.  A good way to balance this is to do check-ins with your spouse find out if you are spending enough time by asking. Have structured date nights and find time just to talk.  Spending time together helps to keep the connections and improves the sex life as well as the friendship.

If time is not taken to keep the communication flowing and continuous bonding. Remember,  to never become complacent in your relationship.  Use time as a tool to help keep your relationship on point and keep you communicating and connecting in all levels.

Procrastinating- Good or Bad?

Nope I can do it tomorrow!!!

Nah not, now later!!!

Please why now, I have time!!!

These are phrases that we use to delay and stall our progress and with one word, these can be described as Procrastinating.  Over the past week, I did a mini survey with some close friends to find out why they thought people procrastinated.  These are a few of the responses:

• Inability to self-motivate -  most times people find it hard to motivate themselves to get up and start, especially when they feel like the task is unpleasant or boring. 
• Doubt - the "I won't success any way" syndrome and the saying "I don't try I would not have failed".
• Low self-esteem -  lack the confidence to try, insecurities, not able to fulfil others expectations and standard.
• Being anal - trying perfect every aspect of the  task can become stressful and cause persons to pause  which will also make them become stressed.
• Inability to recognize incremental achievements - not being able to see the small things and how they add up.
• Not wanting to - rebelling about doing what needs to be done.

The feeling to procrastinate is something that we all face at different points in our lives. No one is immune from it. 

How many times have you used the phrase “I work better under pressure” or "I promise myself that I will finish a task" when I am in the mood?” 

Depending on the situation, depending on the circumstance, our mood or the reason for not doing;  we must admit we go through procrastination. The outcome however is never worth the "procrastinating"!. Note that even after procrastinating the task is still not done and the outcome is sometimes catastrophic and can even affect others.

During the mini survey one of the respondent said that "shrugging it off, is fakes the mood, for a moment" and that makes you feel good as you do not have to face what is to come.  "The fear of the unknown is worst than actually doing". 

But the truth is, the only thing that procrastinating does; is rob us of the most precious thing "TIME". It also prevents us from truly being able to accomplish and reach our full potential. 

One why to beat the 'procrastination disease', yes I said it disease, is to create a 'things to do list'. The list should be dated and updated each day.  At the end of the week it should be compared to the list that you had started with. So that you can measure how much you actually  got done.  Remember when doing your 'things to do' be realistic, note that not all the tasks will be completed "AT ONCE".  

The second is to always looking at the bigger picture. Doing things a little at a time means that you are making strides towards something bigger. Always remember the why! Start by saying I will because......

And finally recognize that you may need help to move, so reward yourself. For every-time you complete a task, do something big!!!!

Walking with my Baggage

Have you every felt like you can't go on.... Like the world is on your shoulders and the storm will never stop...

Life sometimes can be cruel, plaguing us with so much uncertainities; and as we struggle with our past and our inhibitions we seem to be unable to move forward. The baggage that we carry, often makes us question our strength. 

I met a young lady, who in tears said that she was not strong. And, as she spoke she said "you don't know what I am going through, I am weak". I looked at her and said, "no, you are not weak it is the baggage that you carry that is preventing you from moving forward". She smiled as her eyes filled with water.

As we conversed, and she shared her story; it dawned on me that even with incremental progress, even with incremental success she still could not embrace the new opportunities that life presented. 

The reality is that when we go through hurt, disappointments and deceptions; if we have not dealt with it and accepted what has happened it will be difficult for us to continue with our lives. We, must also understand that our strength sometimes will come from support and not many of us can overcome by ourselves.  

In our conversations, she also shared that she did not want "hand-outs", "she wanted to make it without seeking help from anyone". And, while I understand  not wanting to let someone into your space because of fear of being disappointed. We need to realize that in this journey of life; that we all need support and that we all need someone. 

Further, we must understand,  that though the journey is ours, we can't always walk the journey alone without a helping hand.  I expressed this to her, and noted that just talking with me is proof that she needed support.

We ended the conversation where she acknowledged that she needs help to release the baggage so that she can face the future and what it had to offer.

The lesson to learn here, is that while we can never erase our past. We must never let our past hinder our future.  Instead, it must be used as our example for moving forward. In addition, we must understand that we all need a hand sometimes, a voice of reason and that individual that we can lean on to help us ride the storm.